Drunk Obama Resigns!

Propelled by a self-pity-soaked booze binge, fed-up President Barack Obama fired off a shocking resignation letter revealing his true feelings about his role as Commander-in-Chief.

The malcontent memo got straight to the point, according to a highly placed political insider, who reveals the opening line: “Take this job and shove it!” 

For all of the letter’s stunning and outrageous details, pick up the latest issue of GLOBE — on newsstands now!